Patient Stories
Barry Conlin was a U.S. Army veteran, a loving husband, a proud father of two, and an avid collector of classic rock albums.
In 2020 when he was just 58 years old, Barry’s skin started feeling itchy. His wife, Donna Conlin, thought his skin color looked off.
Medical tests revealed that Barry had pancreatic cancer, and despite many rounds of treatment the cancer spread. In August 2023, Barry became a home hospice patient with Rochester Regional Health.
That’s when something extraordinary happened.
Rochester Regional hospice workers routinely ask new patients whether they have any dreams they still wish to fulfill. Barry wasn’t sure. He and Donna talked about a trip to Scotland or maybe a warm beach somewhere. None of that seemed right. Then one morning Barry knew his choice: He wanted to ride a hot-air balloon.
“I want to see how it feels to be near heaven,” he told Donna.
Once clear on this, the couple told Melissa Marchitell, a Social Worker with Rochester Regional Health Home Care and Hospice Care.
Melissa went to work on the project right away. She researched balloon ride companies. She found private donors to pay for the trip.
Timing the trip was a delicate matter. The weather had to be right—warm enough, and sunny. Barry had to feel well. The balloon company had to determine conditions were safe to launch.
Finally, it all came together on October 3, which happened to be their daughter Megan’s birthday. Barry and Donna arose early to be at the Ithaca launch site by 5:30 a.m. They helped spread the balloon out on the ground, and watched it inflate.
The pair then climbed into the basket—Donna says Barry did this more gracefully than she did—and up they went.
“It was just this floating feeling. Complete. Peaceful. So, so quiet, except for the hiss when they adjusted the balloon up and down,” Donna recalls. “We were just getting to the end of the fall leaves in the Ithaca area, so we saw all the trees, and little, tiny people on the ground, and Buttermilk Falls in the distance.”
“Sometimes we went through clouds, and you could feel the moisture in them, the temperature change,” she says. “It was amazing.”
Barry later talked about the trip for a long, long time, Donna recalls. She found a solar light in the shape of a balloon that resembled the one they rode in, then hung it in the house for him to enjoy.
In December 2023, Barry passed. His family—Donna, their son Aaron, and their daughter Megan with her husband and their children Autumn and Sawyer—take comfort in knowing Barry fulfilled his final dream.
“It wouldn’t have happened without hospice,” Donna says. “Melissa handled it all.”
Melissa herself is glad she could help, but shies from the spotlight. Of course the Rochester Regional hospice team cares like family, she says; it’s an honor to support people at the most difficult time of their lives. Of course the team serves as one; they are always calling or texting one another for support or connections to service networks. In Barry’s case, hospice nurse Lori Smith made special trips to prepare him for the balloon ride.
“We work together. We trust each other,” Melissa says. “Going through hospice is difficult. We want it to be a good experience for the patient and their family. We meet them where they’re at and help in any way possible.”
Barry would have turned 62 in February 2024. On his birthday, his family gathered to celebrate. Near them hung a solar light in the shape of a hot-air balloon.
